Sam has been attending his church for years. Recently, he has found himself outsourcing a lot of his growth to online preachers and podcasts. The more he has grown, the more he has struggled with the way things are done in his own church. He has a hard time with the leaders who seem unwilling to make the changes he believes are necessary. What’s more, there is a church nearby that does things the way he wishes they could be done! Sam is confronted with the question, “Should I leave my church?” If you haven’t felt like Sam, odds are you know someone who has.
First, it should be clarified that this post will address the question of whether one should leave their church for another church, not whether one should leave the Church in general. God’s Word is clear that we are all to belong to the bride of Christ, no matter how bruised she may be.
Why do people consider leaving their church? Their reasons may include any of the following: the sermons are boring or outright bad, the worship isn’t cutting it, the culture or demographics of the church aren’t welcoming to outsiders, the leadership has issues, the people are too cliquey, or the church is too big or too small. Which of these reasons are legitimate?
To answer that we have to answer the question: What makes a church healthy in the first place? John Piper gives a helpful list of the bare bones. A healthy church has leaders that:
The Bible doesn’t say which amount of these characteristics needs to be absent to merit leaving. There’s no divine ratio. Of course, it goes without saying that no one should stay behind in a cult or a church with an abusive environment. While the Scripture is silent on just how many basics need to be missing in a church to warrant leaving, the Word does speak to how many problems can be present in a church to still be called to remain there and work on them.
Check out these messed up churches from Scripture:
The list of churches goes on and on. Things got so bad at the church of Corinth that the Apostle Paul even told them “…when you come together it is not for the better but for the worse” (1 Cor 11:17). And yet in spite of the horrid sins and detrimental services at Corinth, God did not urge the Corinthians to leave that church or start another. Instead, God called them through the Apostle Paul to repent. “Wake up from your drunken stupor, as is right, and do not go on sinning. For some have no knowledge of God. I say this to your shame” (1 Cor 15:34). Take this into account as you decide whether or not you ought to leave your church.
John Piper gives probably the most practical test out there. “If the issues are combined to an extent that you think your faith and obedience would be damaged if you stayed and your usefulness there doesn’t outweigh the pitfalls — you are free to go to another church.” In other words, John Piper asks, “Is the church being the church here or is it defective to a degree that I should go to another one?” This is a question of degrees. It’s complex. It’s a lie that someone can simply leave the church without leaving behind a hole in their absence. There will always be an impact on the people who stay behind. The question must be answered with the utmost wisdom.
Honestly ask yourself these additional questions in the process: Do I love my church? Am I having a critical heart? What do I think is wrong? Is there anything I can do about it? Who will benefit if I leave? Who will benefit if I stay? Can I bring an unbeliever here? And as Voddie Baucham posed, can I stay here and not be divisive?
If, in the end, you decide to leave, take into account Piper’s takeaways: Never leave quickly. Consult God in prayer and in the Word. Consult other mature believers. Speak to the leaders about why you’re considering leaving. And always strive for peace, even when you have to go.
